tentacle police

My av stayed up all night with her fellow graduates from the Police Academy. They all got the assignments they wanted, so they celebrated in time-honoured fashion with some laser-cut tattoos. Loica would be laboring with the Wench Police, so she was plastered in tankards and tea towels. Anorak fairly flew into the Fairy Police, so she was wrapped with wings in all shapes and shades. And Portia? Portia was now Tentacle Police. So she was adorned in waving limbs, with a donut thrown in for lunch. (Cop jokes, they’re the worst jokes of all.) 

When people first hear about the Tentacle Police, they imagine that their duty is to ticket the more lascivious of the undulating creatures or seize all the homemade pornography the sinuously sexy beings generate in their spare time. (OnlyFans has their infundibula mucous all over it.) Fact is that the Tentacle Police serve and protect the tentacle population, which may be the target of genocidal assault, people who think they have good taste, spurned boyfriends, and China Miéville, who just can’t get over it already, even though Donna Haraway is buying him another Sea Breeze.

The money doesn’t even fold, but Portia would never think of quitting her job. Like all Tentacle Police, Portia walks a beat. If she’s going to protect her adopted tribe, she needs to know the neighborhood’s limboing limbsters inside and out. But mostly inside. Her one complaint is the winter cold. IRL police earn stripes. In Portia’s unit they earn underwear. Every promotion brings with it a larger pair of panties, culminating in long underwear (with optional footies) for 20 years service. (Of course long undies open in the back, so if Portia’s taking a long walk home on a frigid night, she may ask one of her tentacular friends for a warming ride.)

This is what Portia looked like when she read that the internet isn’t stopping at pixelating nips and pussies. Suckers are next. All million billion trillion gajillion of them.


R2 A/D/E Kika[Silver]Maitreya dress and boots (last month’s Collabor88 so it won’t be in store yet) 

Tentacio, Andromeda pack includes halo and oculus [the oculus tag says Bad Girl and the halo tag says Calm Down]

TOKIO Hair – Balla Alpha Hair – Black

EVERMORE. [hi.tech -thermometer] – high temp

Salt & Pepper, O cuffs

Luxurious Sin – Tentacle Love Tattoo

e.marie // COFFIN w/shine (maitreya lara) nails

e.marie // Lia Earrings – VIP gift


[REVERIE] Galactic Liner – EvoX (all three liners in one pack)

:Dernier: “Hyomin” Eyebrow (Lelutka Evo X) 

VELOUR: Tahani – Lips #04 – BOM for EVO X Only

Jack Spoon. Gia Moles 001(evo X) (VIP group gift)

(Enfer Sombre*) LeLutka EvoX Tears – Lili {B}{White} and (Enfer Sombre*) LeLutka EvoX Tears – Lili {A}{White} in pic four

/ HEAD / lel EvoX CEYLON 3.1

Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara V5.3

K!odio, [Miley] – Shape LeL Avalon Evo X 3.1 / eBODY (I edited the body for Lara but was never able to reduce the thighs so this wasn’t an entirely successful endeavor)

Pic one: SLC, Lost in the Net (with an old lamp by Vespertine tossed in!)

Pic two and three: Loel, Midnight Blue

Pic four: Pixit, Portrait Hands

Gear feels good

I admit to being dismayed when I saw that the theme for Second Life’s 19th birthday was steampunk. I don’t doubt that there are many steampunkers on the grid and elsewhere, but I never did enjoy wearing brown skirt-suits and big goggles. (A black harness and a gag are more my style.) I decided to bypass the birthday celebration sims and go searching for gifts at the Shop & Hop. I was thrilled to snag the glamorous knee-length Elena dress, which Salt & Pepper is offering in a free fatpack. I figured if I was going to mistress my misgivings and do steampunk my av would need something metal to stick on her face. I purchased Portia’s elegant colour-change Vega blindfold and collar at a discount from Zibska. The set also features dangly earrings. The big surprise for me as a stylist and a photographer was how much I loved the ultra-steampunky Gear Halo gift from VALKIRIA. Anything that runs a change on holy or wicked auras is good with me. Plus, reminders of industrialization are unjustly rare in fashion blogs. And yes, the gear turns just like your stomach at themed events. (I am all for Relay For life but I am all against purple.) If you do want to pay for steampunk style check out the Zenith booth, where several outfits are discounted, including a fatpack of an ensemble that features a button shirt and a cloth tutu. There is also a gift with a pretty ruched black short skirt and a lackluster denim camisole. Here you’ll find the TP list for all the vendors.

I don’t think I’ve ever mentioned that I am not a fan of most multi-ring sets. I dislike thin, pretty rings, especially when they are adorned with gems. That’s why I love Kartel Original’s Eunbi rings, which wrap mass-produced metal goods around your digits and then send you home to microwave dinner. Closing out my metal fest are Promagic’s Swarna earrings, which look crafted rather than milled. We can pretend, can’t we, that SLers still use their hands to shape gold?


Zibska, Vega set (colour change; discounted at SL19B Shop & Hop)

Salt & Pepper, Elena (Lara) (gift dress fatpack at SL19B Shop & Hop)

*VALKIRIA* Gear Halo – Cooper Old (gift at SL19B landing area)

PROMAGIC, Swarna Earrings

Kartel Originals – Eunbi Bento Rings – Maitreya 

/ HEAD / lel EvoX CEYLON 3.1

Ladybird, Jackie Lipgloss

LeLUTKA.EvoX.Hairbase.036 (f)

[Glam Affair] Flo Layer [Lelutka EvoX] Fair

Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara V5.3

K!odio, [Xiao] – Shape LeLUTKA Ceylon Evolx 3.1 / LEGACY (my edit)

poses: Stun, Bibi pack

backdrop: Minimal, Retro Backdrop 3 (not steampunk but the best I could do by way of a controlled environment)

talk about beauty and the beast

She’s both. That, at least, is the fantasy I’ve indulged all these years blogging sensational outfits from R2 A/D/E.

The jacket from the Kanu ensemble is loaded with text and symbols. “R2 Cybernetics” tells us that my av may be more human than human. If she’s roaming the grid killing people, it’s likely by assassination rather than total warfare. Especially when she’s dressed in pink and wearing a razor-sharp red bob, we get the impression that her body count can’t be that high. “R2 Defense” tells us she’s not aggressive. The number of warning signs is astounding. One adorns the crotch. This means she’s nobody’s toy. Make sure you get consent with FRIES (freely given, reversible, informed, enthusiastic, and specific). And then read every inch of her suit before daring to take it off. The print is very small so for all I know it’s a user’s manual.

The bathing-suit-style onesie is actually a twosie. You can strip her of top or bottom. Or both. Her gloves—courtesy an old gacha from CURELESS—are crystalline.

I added some fading bruises. These stoke the fantasy that she is a killing machine. Who wears incredible boots fashioned to look like vintage heels complete with ankle straps. Who satisfies herself with spiky pink fingers.

The rainbow lashes are a Jack Spoon free gift . The makeup is all about pride. Who said beauty-as-the-beast is straight?


R2 A/D/E Kanu in [Meta Pink]Maitreya (all sold together, available at Collabor88)

tram, L0325 hair1

CURELESS[+] Precious Gem / M / Crystal Hand / PINK (past gacha, can buy in the fatback)

Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara V5.3

K!odio, [Dae] – Shape LeLUTKA Ceylon Evolx 3.1 / LEGACY (I edited this for Maitreya)

:::G.ID:::. Trauma Legs and Trauma Torso (olde, n/a)

-Pretty Liars- Boobs lift LEVEL 6

/ HEAD / lel EvoX CEYLON 3.1

[Heaux] Tsuki – Browless – Blush [Purple Kisses Ver.] *VE (this was a special edition of the Tsuki skin)

Eye makeup: Sugarose, Carola

Eyes: Reverie, Jubilee Eyes #1

Lashes: Jack Spoon, Pride 22 Lashes (free gift)

Lying pose: K&S poses, Katya 4 (only 50L)

Sitting pose: K&S poses, Me, Myself and I 3 (only 50L)

Standing pose: Stun, Bibi

easter isn’t just for rabbits

May you have the happiest Easter imaginable!

Portia’s Rabbita makeup is from Hanzel. It allows you to mix and match white and pink features.

I finally made the switch to LeLutka Evo X. Portia’s wearing the Ceylon head with the included skin and a divine shape from Toinha. Her color-change ribbon earrings are from Stoic. Her eyes are from rotten. And her flower-strewn blue nails are from Ascendant.

When Easter’s over Bunny goes home to the moon. Portia’s Fiona outfit is by Pixicat, my favorite line. (But it’s not available in this special 50 L Friday color.) Portia’s stockings are by Caboodle. She can wear them with or without flowers on either leg as she chooses.


Caboodle – Ruffled Bunny Ears (group gift)

. Hanzel . Rabbita Whiskers, Nose, Mouth Sides, Mouth Lips, Freckles and Blush [Lelutka Evo X]

Moon World, Eyebrows Heart Moon 18

Keikumu, Milano Lashes

Tutti Belli, Spellbound eyes and lips

rotten . heartthrob eyes . water baby 01 

Jack Spoon. Gia Moles 001(evo X)

– FACE – lel EvoX Ceylon 001 (comes with head)



Nyoko – Yoon-gi Earring 

LeLUTKA.EvoX.Hairbase.029 (f)

-Pixicat- Fiona Dress – PlaidPink (Maitreya)

Ascendant – Boho Nails 03 – Maitreya

Caboodle – Blossom Stockings 

N-core MELISSA “Silver” 

[Toinha] – Shape LeLUTKA Ceylon Evolx 3.1 / MAITREYA

Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara V5.3

Poses by Mewsery, Fox City and Lyrium

Ready to serve

I don’t have any fantasies of service submission. But Portia likes to keep her eye on the madeleines. I put this look together with discount items: I got the hair, lingerie, eyeshadow, eyelashes, and lip gloss via Fifty Linden Friday, Happy Weekend, and my favourite, SoKawaiiSundays.

I paid a pretty packet for these cuffs and collar, past gacha items by Mug, which I picked up on Marketplace. They are gorgeous creations of lace, leather, and chains. (I had to edit the cuff on Portia’s left wrist. Inworld there is no break in that chain.) This picture seems pretty tame. Until you notice the way Portia’s nipple is playing with the pointed cup of the Savannah bra.

Credits (all items are LeLutka Evo)

bonbon – nagisa hair – ombres (comes with a male fit and with a no-bangs version)

Ricielli – Savannah Lingerie Bra (M. Lara) [with collar not shown]

Ricielli – Savannah Lingerie Garter and Panties (M. Lara)

Mug – Lusty Lace – #11 Lace Handcuff Black (old gacha, try Marketplace)

Mug – Lusty Lace – #5 Lace Collar Black (old gacha, try Marketplace)

[Glam Affair] Anika Layer [Lelutka] 003 E

.E l e i. – Nabi (Lipgloss) / LEL EVO-EVOX

keikumu – milano lashes

Core&Gore :: Osho eyeshadows [pink] Evo

Jack Spoon . summer BEAUTY MARKS2 (gift)

rotten . devilish eyes . anzai

LeLUTKA.Head.Lilly.2.5 (static ears)

[LERONSO GIFT] Mesh stiletto nails “Shiny Shane” 

.DirtyStories. 69 Leg Tattoo (olde)

Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara V5.3

poses: nyagore, Little Abigail

location: Ethereal City

I stayed up late…

…to make this for you.

Tentacio, Witch Planning
CURELESS[+] Alouqua Dress Special / MAITREYA
CURELESS[+] Alouqua Wings Bento
.E l e i. – Anya (Skin) / Tone 08 1
emotional circus, final spell (eyeshadow)
Heron, Hallow Makeup (lips)
Jack Spoon . summer BEAUTY MARKS2 (gift)
Nefekalum Tattoos – Spirit (Carved) // Tattoo (old gift)
pr!tty – Cho – :rigged: -Multicolor-
S&P Cuff and Collar Avery
[LERONSO GIFT] Mesh stiletto nails “Shiny Shane”
LeLUTKA.Head.Lilly.2.5 (static ears)
Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara V5.3
rotten . devilish eyes . anzai
Stun, Diana pose
location Ethereal City

Hang on spooky, spooky hang on

Breath play is not safe. That’s why I like this statement from Dan Savage’s column: “What most people who are into choking want is to feel controlled,” said Mistress Matisse. “So put your hand over [their] mouth. Grab [their] hair, wrap an arm around [their] shoulder—not [their] neck—and put your other hand over [their] mouth. That should satisfy the urge.”


{Rosier} / Strangle Spirit / Solid

Moon. Hair // Luna Size 01

[The Forge] Blake Garter, Black, Maitreya

Le Forme, Bento Nails Dk Blossom [MAITREYA]

THIS IS WRONG Bohemian tattoo BLACK FRESH – BoM (was a special event item so it’s not available)

rotten . devilish eyes . anzai

[Glam Affair] Anika Layer [Lelutka] 003 E

LeLUTKA.Head.Lilly.2.5 (static ears)

Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara V5.3

Nantra, Syzygy 4 pose

Embroidered in the dungeon

No, now don’t get excited. This isn’t a new thing to do to your bottom’s body with needles and thread. This is an old-fashioned way of classing up your fetish gear. The Maria Shirt by Asteroid Box was a 50 Linden Friday special: there are smooth, sweet-looking snakes embroidered around the breasts and on the back. The floral pack of the Ila boots by Lybra gives us a bouquet stitched into blue denim. This look was supposed to conjure up another one of my modern mistresses or slaves—a player who doesn’t lead with their bared breasts. I figure this girl is a budding switch, trying to give out a top vibe. She’s a conscientious player. In some of her pouches she’s carrying things like dental floss for micro-bondage, rubber elastics for nipple torture, and clothes pins for tongue trapping. But she’s also packing healthy 72% dark chocolate for aftercare and a vial of arnica so she can alleviate any bottom’s pain, swelling, and bruising. (I carried arnica until I realized bottoms don’t want any of those things ameliorated.)

This is more like it: waiting in the dark at Sole, a femdom dungeon.

Legacy makeup my lovelies: old tat layers of bitty brows and face paint from ARISE.


AsteroidBox. Maria Shirt – Maitreya – FLF Exclusive

[CX] Hell’s Harbinger (Black Out+Silver) Maitreya collar

VINYL – Jello Shots: Panties – Maitreya

VINYL – Nerves Shorts – Maitreya Belt Pak Navy

LYBRA . ILA (maitreya) Floral Collection boots

.Olive. the Korine Hair Fatpack

Kibitz – Phoebe’s cuffs

Le Forme, Bento Nails Dk Blossom [MAITREYA]

La Malvada Mujer – The den of snakes  tattoo/1 (on Marketplace)

[Glam Affair] Anika Layer [Lelutka] 003 E

.e l e i. Nabi (lipgloss)

.ARISE. Drift Tattoo HARD (tintable) (olde)

.ARISE. Ela Brows / Black (olde)

Jack Spoon . summer BEAUTY MARKS2 (gift)

Rosier, Fragile eyes

LeLUTKA.Head.Lilly.2.5 (static ears)

Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara V5.3

Lyrium, Val Idle Stands Breathing Poses

Make Pride

I’m marking Pride month with every celebratory heart in my inventory. Pride has expanded beyond the gay male community to represent multiple gender and sexual communities. This year I learned that the kink community is not friendly to asexuals. It’s great to see virtual rope classes that are dedicated to “LGBTQ” students. But where does that leave the I and the A students? The online asexual munch listed on FetLife consistently drew only two or three RSVPs. A recent Dating Kinky event on asexuality was canceled and has not been rescheduled. I like to joke that an asexual event will only work if it’s geared towards their allies. If the allies show up a few of us ace-types can sneak in. Read “Making Space for Ace (Asexuals) at Your Sex and Kink Parties.”

See you on the beach with this bag, a gift from Belle Epoque at Shop & Hop, where merchants are celebrating SL18B as well as Pride. My av’s hair is Mina’s gift at Shop & Hop. Limos below.


Belle Epoque, Candice Bag Pride Edition (gift at Shop & Hop)

MINA Hair – Shop & Hop 2021 hair (gift at Shop & Hop)

-[ vagrant ]- Monica Shirt – Maitreya – Rainbow Heart

Tee*fy Myla Shorts – CBlue – Maitreya

[RHUDE] Easy Earring 

Mad’ – Pride Rainbow Tattoo [Gay] (VIP gift at the shop)

namo. aine eyeshadow – periwinkle (evo)

Jack Spoon .Prue lashes (duo tone) – Lel Evo

.lovelysweet. cheekie accents pink hearts

Jack Spoon . summer BEAUTY MARKS2

Blood +Fallen Gods Inc., Touch of a lover tattoo (olde)

[Glam Affair] Anika Layer [Lelutka] 003 E

LeLUTKA.Head.Lilly.2.5 (static ears)

Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara V5.3

Stun Poses, Diana