BDSM meets the moon

I had a wonderful experience at a recent rope convention with a man who needed a partner and advertised on Fet. I really liked him, to the point where I thought I might be finally meeting someone I could date. We spent some meals together and scened three times. He introduced me to breath play in the most moderate way possible and thrilled me in several other hot/mean ways. Things did go wrong at the con. I was triggered by a trigger warning. He did not handle that well, could not even empathize with me when I told him about being assaulted. But it was the last day, and he was already pulling away. A few days later, he wrote to check in and told me he was disappointed with the con and with missing the classes that I was unable to hack.

I tried over the past two weeks to be patient and let him go through drop and job stress and come out with positive feelings. But I stopped short of telling him he was an amazing top. I wanted to spare myself the humiliation I’ve experienced in the past: I would PM a top to tell him he was wonderful and describe the parts of our scene I loved, and I would hear nothing in response. I ended up humiliated anyway, because eventually, all my con partner could say was “Don’t worry, you were very good within the parameters.” I sent him an angry message in response to that, and he replied by saying that he’d reread all his messages and didn’t know what he’d said wrong. And felt sad. I then sent a conciliatory message, telling him that from my perspective we had been very lucky to find a partnership that was so enjoyable. We are both intellectuals. He likes good art, not Renoir. I found him attractive without wanting to have sex with him, which is perfect for rope and coincided with his limit on sex. He wore appealingly odd outfits, and would randomly touch my ankle or knee in an affectionate way during class. This was lovely because I wanted to touch him too, and that’s unusual for me: if there’s no connection and chemistry with a stranger, I have no way of faking it. Many times I have sat on mats separated from partners by two or three feet, feeling envious of the cuddling couples in the classes. This time I was with someone who invited me to get close without pressing for it, who even welcomed me when I asked if I could climb into his lap on a morning I was particularly stiff and tired. He stroked my back while I lay there and asked me if I purred. (Be warned: below the cut is a big bare butt.)
Continue reading

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Too many to march

standanddeliversannaWhen the organizers of the women’s march realized 50,000 people might show up, they canceled the planned u-turn route so the crowd wouldn’t run into itself. When 250,000 showed up today, they had to cancel what was left of the march, a short, straight shot from the park to Federal Plaza. We marched it all the same. This was a beautiful day. It was a rally, not a protest, but there were dozens of resistance-inspiring signs and slogans. My favourite by far was “The pussy grabs back.”
stalking-nurseWounded and without the Affordable Care Act, which the Republicans repealed in the dead of night. Now they’ll defund it. They have no plan to replace it.

Credits
r2 A/D/E tsubaki[white&red]Maitreya (at Collabor88: the two items are sold separately; there are also cool armwarmers)
r2 A/D/E tsubaki boots[white&red]Maitreya (at Collabor88: the two items are sold separately)
Violetility – Voodoo Doll Heart and Spine CHERRY (at Memento Mori)
Nox, Spanked butt (includes butt, chest, vag and vag and butt, classic layers, TMP and OMEGA appliers) (at ROMP)
Suicide Gurls, Asrid Unisex tattoo (VIP group gift—fee to join)
Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara V3.5
La Petite Morte, india v2 albino lelutka applier tone 1 (on sale for 100L—go upstairs to find it)
.LeLutka.Mesh Head-STELLA v1.6
[LeLutka]-BRIGITTE hair – Marilyn (on Marketplace)
{S0NG} :: Cupid~ Blue Eye
Shot at Insilico

I topped someone, kinda

tearing-up-saturated I topped for the first time at today’s rope class. It was about untying with intent, which was good, because I can do that. It’s a simple fact that I have no talent for knots and frictions and patterns and physics and maintaining tension while working with knots and frictions etc. But invite me to maintain tension while undoing knots and frictions, while unfixing patterns, while forgetting physics, and I can handle rope like someone who knows what she’s doing. Doing to her bottom, that is. Turns out my instinct is to handle a bottom the way I want to be handled. With body manipulation as well as rope weaving. With slow sensuous movements, then efficient ones, then disconcerting pauses in the action. I didn’t know the man I topped, so I didn’t go too far. He was a very responsive bottom, experienced enough to be relaxed and trusting (even though I was clumsy). I now have a better idea how good it must feel to play with me, because I also respond readily to my top’s moves. (Yes, I said something positive about myself.) (There’s a wee bit of naughty on the flip side of the cut—the flip side of my model’s butt.) Continue reading

Till you come

creepingdawn A couple I met at Shibaricon moved to my town. Suddenly I have two people, both of them tops, to tie with. I’ve played twice with the male half. He describes his topping style as murderous. That’s definitely the right word. Playing with someone rough has helped me to realize that my relationship with my first, oh-so-gentle top was quite romantic. On my way home the first night I played with the new man, I was overwhelmed with vivid sense memories of playing with my top. I remembered the pleasure I took in his company. I especially enjoyed the cute way he smiled and said “uh huh” any time I told him I was going to kill him when I got out of the rope. He was dear to me.  I wish he hadn’t changed that.
learning patience This colour-change bondage set by Phedora looks lovely. But when I first put on the straps locking the wrist cuffs to the thigh cuffs, they were nowhere near where they should be. Editing the set was a fiddly, frustrating business, and I had to default to my curvy av, rather than the skinny model I wanted to shoot, in order to expedite the process. Although someone told me that hers worked out of the box, the product includes a notecard from the creator stating that it requires editing skills. This warning should have been on the vendor. Or the product should not have been released. Or the straps should have been scrapped.

The best pic from this shoot is on the Pleisure Flickr.

Credits
PHEDORA. Isidora set Maitreya Lara v.2 (was at Romp)
(r)M Hair No.39’16 fantasy (0.7-9) HUD
#14 Blueberry – Energy – Boots – Maitreya *Sky* (gacha)
[CX] aka [CerberusXing], Melted Hearts tattoo (red ass optional) (at Uber)
Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara V3.5
Glam Affair – Sia skin ( Fairy Tales ) – Jamaica 08 A
shot at Japan BDSM

Sway in the swarm

ushas wings Suspended awkwardly from her thighs and ankles, Portia is thrilled when licorice allsorts take to swarming around her body, until she realizes that she’s already got something in her mouth. Portia wears Zibska’s Usha, which comprises a headpiece and pieces for the upper and lower arms and hands. They can be copied, so there’s no reason not to bury your avi in baby blocks. The HUD allows you to change the colour of two separate batches of black-striped blocks and to blow them up or shrink them down.
twisting Surrealia Anatine of Stockholm & Lima has just released the RLV compatible Nightingale Cage at ROMP. There are perch, bondage and shibari options. (And probably sex. Sex shmex.) The shibari poses are animated (with a pleasing variety of head positions) so you can watch your bunny swing vigorously until she tosses her licorice allsorts. (Or use the slow motion option in the Developer menu of Firestorm.) There are fewer bars in the cage, and they disappear for some of the perch poses. This affords you the new thrill of snapping a picture of every inch of your imprisoned av, as opposed to the nipple or nose you can glimpse between the bars. As with previous Stockholm & Lima props, the dressing process, though streamlined in permission requests, is involved, and if you crash you have to start again. The leg straps are still too big, even though Portia is not a barely-thighed beauty, so I hope that there will be a resize option in the future.

Credits
Zibska, Usha (at We <3 Roleplay; ty Zib!)
[theSkinnery] Sona eyes (at Chapter Four)
-Glam Affair – Sasha skin – India 02 NB
.random.Matter. – Misery Brows
~Tableau Vivant~ Curly hairbase (tintable)
Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara V3.5
creator unknown, BoltedXMetal v1.2 gag (As usual I don’t recall where I got this, though I thought it was Marketplace. I know I didn’t pay for it.)
shot at The Bower, Hollowtree

Love it and leave it

lovebird What blogger could resist Exposeur’s cage? It’s not the least bit ironic as it heart-frames an av’s sweet face. That’s because love is all around when a slave is on her knees and under lock and key. My lovebird is wearing Svana, a new flower-chain necklace and earrings from Zib Scaggs for Zibska. You can change the colour of each petal of the flower by HUD. I went for jewel tones to harmonize with the Dead Dollz spiked satin lingerie in dark blue. Like all Zibska jewellery, these pieces can be resized. Travel beyond the cut to see the full-length version of the necklace tickle Portia’s nipples. Continue reading

Not spittin’ cotton

hello mom im in jail Multiple choice question: If this photo looks weird to you is it because you haven’t a) shopped this month’s ROMP, b) read my blog before now, c) experimented with extreme camera angles, d) wondered when master’s coming back, or e) all of the above. (What follows is under the cut for work safety reasons.) Continue reading

Green, I am envious

hungup I Flickr follow a number of talented SL photographers who favour BDSM themes. I am envious because I can’t figure out where they source their bondage outfits and props. For years Prairie Kawashima has unknowingly taunted me with her androgynous naked Asian av, who poses modestly in perfectly snug delicate rope harnesses. Driscol Byron’s subs, Laura, a Surprise Package in the Kink Department, Sacha Audeburgh, Ash and Laura Demonista appear latexed and leathered, wrapped and strapped, and bound and gagged to within an inch of their corsets. But with the exception of the gifted Surprise Package, who has begun to blog, none of them names her sources. This leaves me searching for kinky gear on the Marketplace, where I was finally rewarded for my submissive patience (or obstinacy) when I found some affordable fetish wear from DRBC. Continue reading

Future kink

mistressThe leather crop never goes out of style. Portia’s toy comes with Ma Vie’s pack of Mistress poses created for the latest round of Romp.
shame shame I like this candid AO-only shot displaying Portia’s deep shame at being ejected from Insilico for several offences.

Credits
Ma Vie. – Mistress pose pack (comes with crop) (for ROMP)
Exile::KIssing Strangers Natural Fusion 2 (at Collabor88)
r2 A/D/E hika[S]sheer1 (at Collabor88)
r2 A/D/E kagetsu boots[XS]sheer
[Chariot] Cyborg Fashion Choker – White
. a i s l i n g . Simple Nosechain / Gold
[Modern.Couture] Jewelry – Mika Bracelet Gold
-Glam Affair – December skin – AFRICA 02 A (Arcade gacha)
shot at Insilico