A bottom’s cranky body

I love playing with Alexandra (not her real name). She’s inventive. She doesn’t follow the “traditional” Japanese patterns—the ones that tend not to be fatal. The second time we scened, she supported my head with ropes at the base of my skull. I ended up with a headache for ten days. I kept telling Alexandra (still not her real name) that we made this mistake together, and that each of us has to be responsible to the other. Meanwhile, I was being a shit because I kept putting off going to the doctor, thus shirking my responsibility to both of us to be proactive about possible serious injury. I looked in vain for a kink-friendly doctor online, and when I asked a friend who knows the scene pretty well, she assumed I needed a gyno, not a GP! I imagined telling a vanilla GP that I was doing acro-yoga, which is a thing, and that we decided to add some rope because my balance is bad. But I’m one of those “I cannot tell a lie” people and I’m also pretty blunt, so I would have ended up saying something like “I’m into rope bondage and the person tying me up may have done bad things to my head. Not on purpose.” The third time I played with Lexie—Ima call her that now—we did not injure me. The fourth time, during a sublime scene in which I was standing on one leg and had the other bent leg suspended, I sustained some kind of butt-muscle injury on the side of the suspended leg. I met a kinky yoga instructor who said it happened because my hips weren’t open. It takes 90-minutes of mostly yang yoga poses to open my hips. (And probably my legs…if you know what I mean.) That injury plagued me for more than five weeks, and I was really worried that I would go into our fifth scene too butt-borked to play much. Miraculously, my butt—which had been especially tender for days, to the point where I was worried about sciatica—woke up pain-free the day before Sexy Lexi (no one’s real name) and I were supposed to scene. I am happy to report that I emerged unscathed from that scene, having not ceased to breathe when she wrapped my chest very tightly. (UNF. Breath play yo.) I hate thinking that my body is easily injured because before doing rope I hadn’t done anything physical—not since I quit ballet at 10 and gym at 16. I also hate thinking that I am really very old and have to be extra cautious. Now that I have been feeling the effects of positions that don’t seem strenuous, I am even more scared to try suspension again. For some reason, however, Lexapalooza (that name actually suits her) and I have decided to try one. I hope she will like my helmet and football pads.
Tram at Hair Fair. Weird angle on Hedda’s weird face. Nuff said.

Credits
tram, G0517 hair (HUD 3) NEW
.Birdy. May Skin ~Peaches~ (Brown)
S&P lingerie and collar Iris – Lara MMM edition (may not still be available in this colour combo, but group members could buy it last weekend when Midnight Madness was on)
#EMPIRE – Ipomoea – Maitreya
Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara V4.1
AC’s Leather Cuff (free on Marketplace in a very nice, but sadly brown, set)
[Dread] Piercing #5
{S0NG} :: Cupid~ Dark Green Eye
pose not available
shot at Opium Den

The bride wore hemp

We were negotiating under the hard point when she said “I’m drawn to your emotions.” Our scene was not extraordinary and yet it was emotionally intense for me. She tied me as I stood on one foot, breaking the rules I know so well from Japanese kinbaku. She has a knack for making me think “oooh noooo, I didn’t realize she could tie those body parts together.” I felt the delicious unhappiness of being tied, and let myself stay with that feeling far longer than I ever have. I admit I hid my face so that she wouldn’t see me scowling and worry she was going too far. When I mentioned this later, she said “I like your scowly face.” She gave me a gift. It was only the third time we’d tied, so this was a surprise. It was a long lovely scarf, which she said reminded her of me. She used it as a gag, imagining that I would feel shame when I ruined it with my spit. (I didn’t ruin it. I’m not spitty enough. It was so thoughtful of her to play with my love of shame.) At the end of the scene, I collapsed to my hands and knees. I didn’t feel as though I was flying. I’ve had that experience before. I felt as though I was kneeling in front of a big fan, or rather, that the world was a steady stream of delicious air rushing at me, waving through me, not around me. I hoped that she would leave me on my hands and knees, and untie me that way. She did. She managed to stay behind me, leaving me to show off my ecstasy to the busy dungeon. As soon as I was free, I dove into her lap and wrapped my arms all the way around her waist. The voice that told me I shouldn’t be so needy could not break my bliss or my grip. She said “It’s so endearing that you’ve turned into a puddle.” We both feel lucky that we met.
I won the rare Bound Bride gacha from S&P. The HUD offers a range of natural shades of rope and a variety of colours for the gown, in transparent and opaque fabrics. Winning this gave me another reason to feel lucky. Only less earthshakingly so.

Credits
S&P bound bride – Bride – Lara – RARE (Arcade gacha)
S&P bound bride – sandals low – Lara black (Arcade gacha)
Doe: Faye – Gingers (Arcade gacha)
M. Crimson, Old Roses Tattoo (1L on Marketplace; Maitreya, Belleza, Omega and Default body)
Vanilla, 2nd ed. and Fallen Gods Inc., Afterplay Marks
[[RH]] Old Rose Bouquet -Blue (includes pose)
. a i s l i n g . WristCuff (came with a piece of furniture)
Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara V4.1
-Glam Affair – Sasha skin – India 01 C
{S0NG} :: Cupid~ Blue Eye
[Kres] Kinky Neon – Common 9 (past gacha available on Marketplace)
pic 1 shot at Sex Doll Dungeon

Rope’s end

ihazasadcensoredFull frontal nudity under the cut and the latest events leading to a ropeless future. Continue reading

Constantly tested

preparedI’ve been gone for a while. I kept wondering if I was coming back. I’m not sure that I am back. I had two Hallowe’en outfits to blog, but life got in the way, and then I felt no interest in SL. Truth be told this has partly to do with the fact that I now need to use a mouse with my laptop and don’t want to sit at a desk to recreate after sitting at a desk to work. Continue reading

BDSM isn’t sex, but it is

thisistheendTwo posts ago I wrote about being dumped by my top. I said I would try to write about the problem of sexual reciprocity. Follow me under the cut.  Continue reading