i persist

I persist in being the holiday blogger who doesn’t like holidays, except for Easter. (Being a bunny rabbit in SL is my favorite thing, so I am looking forward to celebrating the year of the rabbit.) Today I am sharing a New Year’s Eve look inspired by Pixicat’s 50L Friday offering of a figure-hugging green sequined jacket, which I coordinated with her Alex pants in a winter-friendly plaid. I finally got a chance to use Doux’s Samantha hairdo, which I nominate as the hands-down winner of best hair of 2022.

I have never made a New Year’s resolution, which is smart, because then I don’t have to lose weight. My restorative yoga teacher says that instead of choosing a mantra like “I will be healthy,” one should activate the present and think “I am healthy.” I’m not sure how this is supposed to work. I may have been blissed out in surfboard pose when the teacher explained. But I think it has to do with manifesting what you want as opposed to thinking it’s going to arrive some day. In addition to “I am healthy,” I think “I am thriving.” (Lies. It’s all lies. Lies that may not serve me.)

Why don’t I like holidays? Because I am always alone. I went to the NYE party at the dungeon for a few years. One evening I met a man who was sufficiently interesting to meet again for a long chat. He talked about exactly the same things he had talked about on NYE. There was nothing more there. (He also did all the talking. Never stopping for me to say something about myself. This is a common mistake. That it is a mistake is common knowledge. But men continue to do it.) A couple of medium-bad actors later, I can enthusiastically mantra “I am ‘not urs,'” as my avi’s tat would have it. Bad actors are not the big problem. The big problem is the systemic discrimination by patriarchy that enables them. If you resolve this year to practice restorative yoga, and you find yourself in that delicious heart opener supta baddah konasana, take this as an opportunity to imagine “Patriarchy is smashed.”

Credits

First 2 pix: -Pixicat- Alex Pants – TartanGreen (Maitreya)

-Pixicat- Violet Blazer – SequinGreen (Maitreya) (50L Friday special)

Last pic: -Pixicat- Ricci Shirt – LeatherBlack (Maitreya Flat)

DOUX – Samantha Hairstyle (One has to buy the full pack to get the hairpins. I pout.)

/ HEAD / lel EvoX ORA 3.1

naja // shimmer skin lel evox icy nb (Velour tone. The brows on the brow version are big and black and scowling—hot.)

BNNB makeup, Cece eyebrown (sic) (applier)

KILLJOY no thx tattoo EVOX (not urs tat)

Little Foxy Beauty, dolly eyelashes (pack 1)

eyes: Gloom. – Blessed Collection – Fatpack 

[Apika] Spiky Septum V2 Gold (group gift, possibly gone)

[CX] Stygian Coil – Gold / Un-Rigged (earrings group gift, possibly gone)

friday – Luna Leather Ring Set (Maitreya)

.:Avanti:. Satima Nails (Maitreya)

Pure Poison – Le Ballet Flats – Black for Maitreya (oh so old but not necessarily gone)

Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara V5.3

SHAPE Default lel EvoX ORA my edit 

Black Nest, Kani Party Decoration (1L on Marketplace)

Poses: Mewsery, Senpai (moved to Marketplace)

Embroidered in the dungeon

No, now don’t get excited. This isn’t a new thing to do to your bottom’s body with needles and thread. This is an old-fashioned way of classing up your fetish gear. The Maria Shirt by Asteroid Box was a 50 Linden Friday special: there are smooth, sweet-looking snakes embroidered around the breasts and on the back. The floral pack of the Ila boots by Lybra gives us a bouquet stitched into blue denim. This look was supposed to conjure up another one of my modern mistresses or slaves—a player who doesn’t lead with their bared breasts. I figure this girl is a budding switch, trying to give out a top vibe. She’s a conscientious player. In some of her pouches she’s carrying things like dental floss for micro-bondage, rubber elastics for nipple torture, and clothes pins for tongue trapping. But she’s also packing healthy 72% dark chocolate for aftercare and a vial of arnica so she can alleviate any bottom’s pain, swelling, and bruising. (I carried arnica until I realized bottoms don’t want any of those things ameliorated.)

This is more like it: waiting in the dark at Sole, a femdom dungeon.

Legacy makeup my lovelies: old tat layers of bitty brows and face paint from ARISE.

Credits

AsteroidBox. Maria Shirt – Maitreya – FLF Exclusive

[CX] Hell’s Harbinger (Black Out+Silver) Maitreya collar

VINYL – Jello Shots: Panties – Maitreya

VINYL – Nerves Shorts – Maitreya Belt Pak Navy

LYBRA . ILA (maitreya) Floral Collection boots

.Olive. the Korine Hair Fatpack

Kibitz – Phoebe’s cuffs

Le Forme, Bento Nails Dk Blossom [MAITREYA]

La Malvada Mujer – The den of snakes  tattoo/1 (on Marketplace)

[Glam Affair] Anika Layer [Lelutka] 003 E

.e l e i. Nabi (lipgloss)

.ARISE. Drift Tattoo HARD (tintable) (olde)

.ARISE. Ela Brows / Black (olde)

Jack Spoon . summer BEAUTY MARKS2 (gift)

Rosier, Fragile eyes

LeLUTKA.Head.Lilly.2.5 (static ears)

Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara V5.3

Lyrium, Val Idle Stands Breathing Poses

Cheapskate

I have a confession to make. I spend my weekend mornings happily shopping the sales, picking up enough cheap stuffs to compile and style a look. I’m talking about Fifty Linden Friday, which yielded the delectable CURELESS tattoos worn here, The Saturday Sale, Happy Weekend. Sometimes I’ll spy something from Wanderlust Weekend, which is aimed at role players. My fave is So Kawaii Sunday, which is like a vein of cute and sexy gold. In this photo Portia is sporting 8 steals. Thanks to these sales I’ve been able to experiment with skins from Pyscho Pills, which Portia is wearing with green hair, and Heaux, which Portia is wearing with a fetching fascinator. Because the skin is 75 L at most, paying for the body to match the tone feels like a sweet deal. These newer skin lines are doing wonderful work for LeLutka Evo.

I loved slipping on Wen, a fascinator with choker (not shown) and delicate orbits. The earrings from Hate Me and Eat Me are so cool that I used them again for my green-haired girl. The fatpack is only 150 L at Lybra. I learned to do a thing where I can make Portia’s eyes glossy! These are a gift from La Malvada Mujer. Faina Cortes makes excellently odd eyes.

It’s hard to believe that we’re back to layers. I saved all of mine. They aren’t high-def, but I was pleased with my pale-green tinted Noh brows, an oldie from [CX]. Portia’s hair by Doe is the fabulous Kraken pack.

Credits (I have very little control over WordPress’s new editor so the spacing is borked)

Look Gold and Green and Miffed

R2 A/D/E sou bottom[Gold]Maitreya (at Collabor88)
R2 A/D/E sou top[Gold]Maitreya (at Collabor88)
Psycho Pills x A.Doutzen – Usagi Skin Eyelid 2 W/B (icecream)

Psycho Pills – Usagi Shape edited
{S0NG} :: Ada Eyes – Lime Green (Omega applier)
[CX] Noh Eyebrows (Tintable)
+FATHER+ Flutter Shadow – Greenblue – BOM
CURELESS[+] Moonlight Revenge / Pelvis
CURELESS[+] Moonlight Revenge / ChestPsycho Pills x A.Doutzen –
Doe: Lynn – Kraken
HMAEM . LUNA EARRING at Lybra
RAWR! Cuban Bracelet
Secrets, Sweet Butterfly Piercing
Mug – Aysha Sandal
LeLUTKA.Head.Erin.1.0(static ears)
Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara V5.1
pose: Stun, Tai (with gun)
pose: Stun, Diana (medium shot)

Look Fascinating

Zibska, Wen Headpiece
Zibska, Eveline Lips 18
La Malvada Mujer, Alpha Eyes (past gift, now 45 L)
[Heaux] Kate Skin – Light Brows – Shell
Psycho Pills – Usagi Shape edited
-Pixicat- Rebel Jacket – Mint (Maitreya)
HMAEM . LUNA EARRING at Lyrba
LeLUTKA.Head.Erin.1.0(static ears)
LeLUTKA.Hairbase.002.brown.02
Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara V5.1
pose: Fox City, Portrait pose

Halloween dreamed

WordPress won’t let me use the old editor so I have no idea how to share all the
beautifully scary ideas I have floating around in my head.

I gave up on posting this a few days before Halloween because WordPress
wouldn’t let me edit or publish what I was able to toss together.

I’m trying out Safari now in the hope that it will work.

If this works you will be able to read me say “I hope you had a lovely Halloween.
Don’t hate me for having no control over line spacing.”

Credits Pics 1 and 2

CURELESS[+] Moirai Sisters / M / Atropos Torso / RARE

CURELESS[+] Moirai Sisters / M / Moirai Collar / RARE

CURELESS[+] Moirai Sisters / Fata Tattoo PINK / RARE

Zibska Rus Makeup 01 (gift at Shop and Hop)

CURELESS[+] Red Dragon Marking / L+R+Forehead

Mad’ – Infected FaceTattoo [light] [Full]

[CX] Noh Eyeliner Style 1 light black (old tattoo layer)

[Glam Affair] Anika Layer [Lelutka] 003 E

[TWC]- Blossom body tattoo (past rare gacha)

#*.bunnyboo.* spooked nails red LEGACY

#187# Nose Piercing Spikes

::Axix:: Arisu Gatcha Gloves [Red] // MAITREYA (gacha)

::Axix:: Arisu Gatcha Okobos [Red] // MAITREYA (gacha)

Clawtooth: Dark Queen (Small/Med Bust) – Dark Ombre

LeLUTKA.Head.Erin.1.0(static ears)

Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara V5.1

Pic 1 pose: Mewsery, Senpai Bento Pose Pack

Pic 2 kiwi / Spooky Balloon Pumpkin

Credits Pics 3 and 4

LERONSO// Group gift/ Halloween Gift 2020 – LELUTKA (with shape)

THIS IS WRONG Baroque eyebrows BLACK

La Malvada Mujer – Dominique / red (group gift)

Mad’ – Infected FaceTattoo [light] [Full] (group gift)

Velour, Ingrid HD Lips Goth Vs. 2

CURELESS[+] Moirai Sisters / M / Clotho Dress / BLACK (past gacha)

#*.Bunnyboo.* Spooked Nails Red.

Caboodle – Nun’s Habit (group gift)

Kibitz – Razor earrings

Peekaboo – Neon Cross

#187# Nose Piercing Spikes

phedora ~ Jezebel Boots ~ Maitreya

LeLUTKA.Head.Erin.1.0(static ears)

Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara V5.1

Pic 3 kiwi / Spooky Balloons

Pic 4 pose: Stun, Anim Pack Collection Bento Nurse 38

Ladylike latex

Credits
-Pixicat- Dragon.Dress Seductive nr1 (Maitreya) RARE (gacha at Epiphany)
07_{-Maru Kado-} Halo-Yubikiri Black (gacha at Kagami event)
tomoto, bell geta pink (maitreya) (gacha at Kagami event)
Zenith, Hydrangea Arborescens Purple (gacha at Crystal Heart event)
Dura, *DG*64 (Light red)
Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara V4.1
[CX] Biomech Claws (Maitreya) (limited time group gift)
: Amorous : You bracelet n/a
Saga, Bohemian Flower Tattoo (gift)
[theSkinnery]Ming-Bare face(honey) NB CL2 n/a
.Birdy. Red (Scar) Porcelaine
.Pekka. HOMICIDAL Lipstick (fear)
[CX] Noh Eyeliner Style 1 (Tintable)
Rotten Toe, Goth brows 1
#adored – kit lashes
{S0NG} :: San~ Aqua Eye
pose 1 Nantra, Syzygy 4M
pose 2 X, Schoolgirl 1
shot at Filthy Sakura

Koibito kimono

Finger the deliciously erotic goods at Re:Japonica and stock up for your next orientalist scene. But only until April 9, which is April 8th in the West. Get there by the 7th to be safe. (Venture under the cut only if you are alone and certain the FBI hasn’t slaved your microwave.)

Till you come

A couple I met at Shibaricon moved to my town. Suddenly I have two people, both of them tops, to tie with. I’ve played twice with the male half. He describes his topping style as murderous. That’s definitely the right word. Playing with someone rough has helped me to realize that my relationship with my first, oh-so-gentle top was quite romantic. On my way home the first night I played with the new man, I was overwhelmed with vivid sense memories of playing with my top. I remembered the pleasure I took in his company. I especially enjoyed the cute way he smiled and said “uh huh” any time I told him I was going to kill him when I got out of the rope. He was dear to me.  I wish he hadn’t changed that.
This colour-change bondage set by Phedora looks lovely. But when I first put on the straps locking the wrist cuffs to the thigh cuffs, they were nowhere near where they should be. Editing the set was a fiddly, frustrating business, and I had to default to my curvy av, rather than the skinny model I wanted to shoot, in order to expedite the process. Although someone told me that hers worked out of the box, the product includes a notecard from the creator stating that it requires editing skills. This warning should have been on the vendor. Or the product should not have been released. Or the straps should have been scrapped.

The best pic from this shoot is on the Pleisure Flickr.

Credits
PHEDORA. Isidora set Maitreya Lara v.2 (was at Romp)
(r)M Hair No.39’16 fantasy (0.7-9) HUD
#14 Blueberry – Energy – Boots – Maitreya *Sky* (gacha)
[CX] aka [CerberusXing], Melted Hearts tattoo (red ass optional) (at Uber)
Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara V3.5
Glam Affair – Sia skin ( Fairy Tales ) – Jamaica 08 A
shot at Japan BDSM

Not spittin’ cotton

Multiple choice question: If this photo looks weird to you is it because you haven’t a) shopped this month’s ROMP, b) read my blog before now, c) experimented with extreme camera angles, d) wondered when master’s coming back, or e) all of the above. (What follows is under the cut for work safety reasons.)

Crises at midlife and midnight

Is there a difference between my sudden embrace of kink and anyone else’s midlife crisis? I don’t believe so. I can’t be the only person to regret time lost or wasted, to claw my way out of a moribund state, of years-long depression and more than a decade fearing sex. Over the past year I have become capable not only of “extreme” and “perverse” acts and emotions but of acts and emotions PERIOD. I have rediscovered sociability, friendship and intimate relationships. I leave my house at night to spend time with people. (Weeks of tracking my insomnia show me that I sleep best when I come home from an outing and go straight to bed.) I have the peace of mind and confidence to reconnect with professional peers and my mother. I even started shopping again. Now that I am buying lingerie, sex toys and rope for my dungeon nights, a pair of completely unnecessary brightly striped loafers might seem like a comparatively conservative and practical addition to my wardrobe. (Reader, I purchased them.)